I can’t quite believe that it’s the 30th December 2016. I’ve spent 364 days ‘taking hold of the life that is truly life’
I’m sorry I haven’t written here very often, despite my intention to write daily for the last 50 days of this year. I’ve been busy taking hold. I’ve been working hard. I’ve been with my family. I’ve been reading books. I’ve rested when I needed to rest. I’ve listened when I needed to listen. I’ve tried not to do too many things at once.
It’s been an interesting year. I began the year with a few really big preoccupations and a decision to try to keep focusing on the things that I knew really mattered. I wanted to let the events of the past become past events in my life. I wanted to keep putting my trust in God on a daily basis. I wanted to live from a place of wholeness rather than a place of brokeness. Yes I know I’ve been broken but I also know that God gifts us with wholeness, and that was what I believed I was promised.
I knew that I had to change some things myself. ‘Take Hold’ was a command. A directive. An action. I couldn’t leave it all to God. I knew what I needed to do and my heavenly Father was there close by always ready to encourage me, and to give me a hug when I didn’t make the best choices, but I had to reach out my hand and close it around the things I really wanted.
In the course of the year I became better at working out what the life that is truly life looks like. I’m still learning, and as well as taking hold of the life that is truly life I still sometimes take hold of the wrong things. I hope that I’m getting better at releasing them again and leaving my hands ready to take the good things that are out there.
I began the year very aware that there were a lot of very good things in my life but somehow I didn’t believe that they were really mine to take hold of. I thought I wasn’t good enough. I didn’t really believe that I was forgiven, redeemed and fully welcome to take my place in God’s Kingdom on earth. I couldn’t believe that I had a strong and happy marriage, children who love me, amazing friends, work that gives me a crazy amount of satisfaction, a restored relationship with my church, good health, and the chance to walk alongside people and share what I know of God’s love with them.
I end the year having claimed each of those things as mine. I’ve taken hold of all those elements of the life that is truly life. I’m excited about where these words have taken me, and even though I may choose a new word for 2017 I won’t be leaving this year’s words behind me.